My right hand has been shaking a lot lately. I took some of
my student employees out for lunch recently – at a very nice restaurant! – and
halfway through the appetizer, the fork flew right out of my right hand. “It’s
fine,” I told them. “”See? If we get thrown out of here, it’ll be my fault, not
yours.”
I made light of it for their sake, but it keeps happening.
It happened twice last week: things just flew out of my right hand.
Naturally, my thoughts take the gloomiest possible courses. Now that I actually have something serious, I think of the most horrible things. . Multiple sclerosis?
It usually happens to younger people. Parkinson’s disease?
Oh yes: I’m in the age group, and I drool, and I tremble. (One of the other
symptoms of Parkinson’s is “confusion,” which sounds very funny, but which is
very sobering to me, because I’m far more confused now than I used to be.) Essential tremor? Maybe.
It does happen when I’m stressed or tired. But sometimes it happens whenever it
wants to happen.
I have a regular non-cancer-related doctor’s appointment in December. I’m sure he’s
tired of hearing me whine about all of the things I think I might have, but
this he’s gonna hear about.
When I was in the Peace Corps, I had a friend who had MS.
She went into tremors occasionally, but she was funny about it. “I’m
demyelinating!” she’d yell, and sit and tremble for a while.
Long story short: she got better. Her MS (thank god) got
better, as sometimes happens.
What do I have? Possibly nothing.
But probably I need to be tested.
At my advanced age, you never know.
