Total Pageviews
Sunday, January 12, 2014
For Sunday: Wonder Woman spins, and spins, and spins
Thursday, October 31, 2013
For Halloween: The Great Pumpkin
Friday, October 18, 2013
Raymond Burr
Sunday, October 6, 2013
For Sunday: A man arguing with his own stomach
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Salty Brine
Saturday, August 24, 2013
Mister Ed
Thursday, August 8, 2013
In memoriam: Cosmo "Gus" Allegretti
Thursday, August 1, 2013
The decline and fall of CNN
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Vintage drinking glasses
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Froggy the Gremlin
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
Movie review: "Star Trek Into Darkness"
Friday, April 12, 2013
Annette Funicello
Annette Funicello passed away on Monday. It wasn’t a surprise; she’s been sick for a long time – she was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 1987, and has been battling it ever since.
But it is a very sad occasion for me.
Annette was my very first television crush, back in the late 1950s / early 1960s, when she was one of the original Mousketeers. She was so pretty! And she was always smiling!
Annette had a singing career, and she even had her own TV show for a while. Then, in the mid-1960s, there were the Beach Party movies with Frankie Avalon. I never tire of seeing those beach movies; they are eternal 1960s summer, with no shadow of Vietnam or the counterculture. Annette is always the Good Girl; Frankie is always tempted by the Bad Girl (Connie Stevens, or Luciana Paluzzi, or whomever), but he always comes back to Annette.
Annette did occasional gigs in the 70s and 80s, but not much. Then, after her MS was diagnosed in 1987, she and Frankie Avalon made the dreadful-but-loveable “Back to the Beach,” with Connie Stevens and Pee-Wee Herman. It’s a twenty-years-later beach movie, which tries to recapture the feeling of those madcap stupid 1960s beach movies. It fails, naturally.
But who cares? It was fun. I watched it three or four times, because I loved Annette.
And I still do.
Rest in peace, sweetheart.
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Networking
Not long ago I received an email entitled “The ABC Insider,” with news and views about ABC's programming season. I glanced through their schedule, and their ads, and their promos, and I found myself thinking: Yeah, it looks like ABC.
And then I stopped and wondered: what did I mean by that?
When I was a kid in the 1960s and early 1970s, we pretty much subsisted on programming from the Big Three: ABC, CBS, and NBC. Somehow, each network managed to have a personality (we call it “branding” nowadays). I never really thought about it at the time, but I think about it now, and it was real then, and it's real now.
I managed to put myself into a kind of memory trance to dredge up recollections of programs I watched in those days, and I tried also to remember what network they were on. It was surprisingly easy. (I went through later, using that new invention “The Internet,” to verify my recollections, and I was right in every instance.) I then looked for a thread that ran through the programming in each network's case, and in each case I didn't have to look very hard.
NBC was in those days the sophisticated network: “Laugh-In.” “The Tonight Show.” Later, “Julia” (“brought to you with pride . . . by Jello”). NBC was urban in a kind of wink-wink Playboy Club way, or in a dignified dinner-party way. It was For Grownups, or For Those Who Wanted To Believe They Were Grownups.
CBS churned out variety shows: Red Skelton, Gary Moore, Carol Burnett, Jackie Gleason. They were the home of all those hick comedies like “Beverly Hillbillies” and “Green Acres” and “Petticoat Junction.” And, of course, they were the home of Lucille Ball. CBS was almost vaudeville. I remember when I went to college in Spokane in 1974, the local CBS affiliate's office still had the old mid-60s network slogan on its facade, “The Stars' Address.” CBS was all about personalities: familiar names, proven talent. And not just Entertainment, but Family Entertainment. No grin-grin wink-wink here; everything was broad and obvious. This was the network that churned out “Hee Haw” a few years later.
ABC was all over the map. “Hollywood Palace.” “Peyton Place.” “Garrison's Gorillas.” “Alias Smith and Jones.” “Batman.” “Bewitched.” “That Girl.” With very few exceptions, they were half-hour shows, brittle and jokey, or broad and soapy. ABC was almost the 1960s equivalent of the Fox Network. Most of all, ABC skewed young: bright new faces, chirpy comedies.
All these decades later, it continues. I look at a show like “The Ghost Whisperer,” earnest and cute and mock-dramatic, and I think: yeah, CBS. And I look at something kooky and snapping-fingers hip like “Lost,” and I think: yeah, probably ABC.
But now there's a channel for everything. (I have a fond memory of the episode of “Married with Children” when they first got cable: “What's this?” “The Japanese Channel.” Click. “What's this?” “The Stained Glass Network.”) But a network/channel like that isn't really the same thing. It's like a store that sells only Scotch Tape. The three big networks in the 1960s were like full-range department stores, each with a slightly different feel: upscale, midrange, family-friendly, bargain-basement.
(But the deepest mystery of all is this: what in the world is going on inside the brain of a fifty-five-year-old man who has to concentrate hard to remember today's date, but who can still remember what network “Garrison's Gorillas” was on, forty-five years later?)
Friday, November 23, 2012
Morning TV
On “30 Rock” a few seasons ago, Tracy Morgan came charging in and asked Tina Fey: “Liz Lemon, who's crazier: me or Ann Curry?”
Well, Ann Curry is gone now, crazy or not. She giggled a little too much, and she was definitely a lightweight. But she was definitely a morning-show person, god bless her, no matter how crazy she might have been.
Morning-show people always seem to become part of the family. While I'm in the bathroom on weekday mornings, getting ready for work, I can hear Partner laughing at George Stephanopoulos and Robin Roberts and Sam Champion on “Good Morning America” in the bedroom.
Before George, of course, there was big ugly/handsome Chris Cuomo (brother of the current Governor of New York), who mostly seemed to enjoy getting into ticklefights with Sam Champion.
Then there was the gorgeous CBS weekend host Chris Wragge, big and blond, like your handsome athletic cousin. He actually hosted the CBS weekday morning show for a while, but left this past January. He won’t be soon forgotten hereabouts.
Even the local hosts are interesting. Partner and I used to enjoy the oddball pairing of Mark Zinni and Michelle Muscatello on Providence's Channel 12: they were always making each other laugh, and often came within inches of saying inappropriate things, which was exhilarating. Michelle is still with us in Providence, but Mark is back in Cleveland, his home town. I miss him.
Then there was the monstrous Vince DeMentri, who used to be the local Fox morning host. He was big and blocky and handsome, but he gave off a kind of DANGER signal, like the abusive husband in a Lifetime movie. The show had a meek little co-host named Sean Tempesta, who seemed to make Vince furious; after a while, Vince wouldn't even share the set with Tempesta.
Then, suddenly, DeMentri disappeared. I did a little research – wonderful place for research, the Internet! - and found that Vince had been a very bad boy in Pennsylvania before coming to Providence; he'd had an affair with another anchor, started doing stupid things (he hid her blow-dryer!), etc. After he left Providence he went to New York City, where a few years ago he slapped the Bahamian ambassador’s driver for getting in his way. Vince was acquitted, but lost his job in NYC. God knows where he is now.
I love morning television. It's like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get.
Thursday, October 25, 2012
RuPaul's All-Star Drag Race 2012
I am only half alive when RuPaul isn’t on the air. I have barely survived over the past few months, eating flavorless food and breathing stale air.
But all that changed on Monday night.
Ru’s back, bitches!
This season is different: Ru has brought back twelve of the top queens from the past seasons. We have Nina Flowers, and Pandora Boxx, and Shannel! We have Yara Sofia, and Manila Luzon, and Latrice Royale!
Naturally I have my favorites. I love Manila (though I notice many of the queens on the show aren’t crazy about her; I suspect she’s pretty high-intensity in person). And Chad Michaels is a consummate professional, and I never before realized how very beautiful (both as a man and as a woman) Shannel is. And Nina Flowers is as funny and energetic and engaging as ever, and Latrice is herself (as always).
I’m not a drag queen myself; I have no impulse to dress as a woman. (I only wish I had that much fashion sense.) But I love the energy, and commitment, and bravery that the queens on the show have. I love their humor. I actually think I learn a little something about color and design when I watch them put their outfits together. So I suppose this counts as educational television too.
Also, I think there’s a deeper subtext here, about performance as a natural human act. Don’t we all construct characters and perform them for other people? Don’t you portray one person on the job and another at home? Don’t you act differently with your family than you do with your friends?
I thought so. Me too.
So: if you’re going to create yourself as a character, make yourself a memorable character, or a beautiful character. Or (preferably) both.
There’s a moment in the Mahabharata when Yudisthira, a prince in exile, is sent into exile with his four brothers. By the terms of a wager they’ve made (and lost), they must spend a year in hiding. Yudisthira asks his father, the god Dharma, what to do. And Dharma says: “Let your disguise be guided by your most secret desire.”
So Yudisthira, a gambler, becomes a teacher of gambling. His brother Bhima, a glutton, becomes a cook.
And their brother Arjuna, the greatest and most powerful warrior in India, becomes a woman.
And he goes on, after exile, to win the war.
You go, girl!
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
A world of opportunity
While in France, we were stuck (of course) with French TV. This is not so bad: they have game shows, and variety shows, and talk shows, and comedies, and dramas.
Since neither my nor Partner’s French is completely fluent, however, we pretty much stuck to CNN.
The news was – odd. They do a strange mélange overseas: American stories (GIANT EYEBALL FOUND ON FLORIDA BEACH!) to global-interest stories (the saxophone industry in Taiwan, for example).
(I’m not kidding. They did a story on the saxophone industry in Taiwan. We saw it at least six times, on six different days.)
All this is fine. But what really captured my attention were the commercials.
No more commercials for The Scooter Store or the Jitterbug! These were commercials for countries.
For example: every ten minutes (it seemed), CNN / France showed an edited version of this video, which portrays “the unforgettable energy of freedom” in the nation of Georgia. Behold!:
(I like the music, and the dancing. I was not, however, aware that there were Georgian Ninjas.)
Speaking of former USSR republics, here’s Azerbaijan:
Lots of factories and oil wells and fast cars, and a decent-looking restaurant. Okay! I will definitely build my saccharin factory there!
Many other countries were represented. There was a Taiwanese ad with a nice-looking man doing Chinese calligraphy with a mop. There was Kazakhstan (not so memorable). There was Morocco (all factories and factory workers, but with a nice Moroccan-music background). There was Montenegro (part tourism, part business).
But I will leave you with my very favorite, for eastern Poland.
And I ask you: why haven’t you invested in eastern Poland?
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Anderson Cooper
I was pleasantly surprised to hear on TV the other morning that my darling boy Anderson Cooper has come out of the closet.
Not that this is a surprise, mind you. I think I (and many others) have pretty much always known that Anderson is on our team. I am always delighted when a celebrity comes out of the closet. As I’ve said before: the more the merrier. It makes it that much easier for a teenager in Two Dot, Montana to come to terms with his / her own sexuality.
And I do like the words Anderson chose, for their breezy casualness: “The fact is, I’m gay, always have been, always will be, and I couldn’t be any more happy, comfortable with myself, and proud . . . By remaining silent on certain aspects of my personal life for so long, I have given some the mistaken impression that I am trying to hide something — something that makes me uncomfortable, ashamed or even afraid. This is distressing because it is simply not true.”
Do yourself a favor and go read Anderson’s whole letter on Andrew Sullivan’s blog.
It addresses, nicely and neatly, the question: Is there ever a good reason to stay in the closet?
For Anderson, there were two: the desire to have a private life, and the desire – as a journalist – to maintain objectivity. (“I want to report the news, not be the news,” he said.) Not that there’s any question about his objectivity; I find his reporting very balanced. But then, I’m a fan. But his deeper point is worth pondering. If you’re a member of the radical right, what do you think of Rachel Maddow? Smart? Incisive? Nah. She’s that lesbian on MSNBC. See, for a lot of people, you can’t be gay and objective. You’re always advancing the gay agenda.
(As I'm advancing it now. As in: gay people are part of society. Always have been, always will be. And, increasingly, we are choosing not to live in celibate seclusion. So go deal with it.)
As a journalist, Anderson was confident of his own objectivity, but was (understandably) reluctant to give critics any reason to doubt his objectivity. Appearances aren’t everything, but they’re not nothing.
But sometimes the mere fact that you’ve come out – Here I am! You wanna make something of it? – is a worthwhile and powerful statement. It goes to prove that “gay,” like “Asian-American” or “Californian,” is just one of many attributes, and it doesn’t define or inform your entire life. He’s not Anderson Cooper the gay journalist; he’s Anderson Cooper the journalist. (Example: Neil Patrick Harris is super gay. But he plays a womanizer on a stupid CBS sitcom, and people love it. And I love him for doing it.)
(And here’s another thing: it’s not always safe to be openly gay. Read this excellent piece by Kathy Griffin on the subject. She points out, very neatly, that gay people are subjected to hatred and violence in much of the world – including the United States. She praises Anderson’s bravery, and rightly so.)
All things considered, I think Anderson made the right decision. And I like that he did it right after the end of Pride Month. Here’s the message I got from that: Pride doesn’t end on June 30. It’s a yearlong activity.
Long live Anderson Cooper.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
PBS
Public television, when I was a kid in the 1960s, was a weak and watery thing. It was the fifth and feeblest of the stations broadcasting where I lived (the others were the three major networks and a local independent station that mostly showed old movies and reruns). PBS (in Portland: KOAP / Channel 10) was always full of static, and often faded in and out. My mother didn’t like it when I watched it; she was afraid that the static actually harmed the TV set. (People – especially my mother – believed lots of crazy things in those days.)
I was a nerdy child, and I was fascinated by the bizarre variety of shows on Channel 10: cooking shows, language shows (I remember “Beginning Finnish”), college lectures. (Frankly, I got some part of my education, and my intellectual curiousity, from Channel 10, and god bless them for it.)
Something happened in the late 1960s. “Sesame Street.” “Masterpiece Theatre.” All of a sudden, people were watching public TV, and talking about it.
It’s a pillar of the temple nowadays: news programs, science, commentary, foreign programming, odd programming. Who else would have broadcast an entire series of Peter Brook’s “Mahabharata”? Who else would show an animated version of the “Popol Vuh”?
Cable has taken away some of PBS's uniqueness, but PBS is still free, still broadcasting away.
And the Republicans have always hated it, and want to take away its federal funding.
Kids: tell the Republicans to go to hell. Vote Democrat, and give to PBS.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
The waiting room
I write this while sitting in the waiting area of a medical office, waiting for Partner to have a two-hour test. There is a TV in the corner (tuned to MSNBC). We are all sitting numbly and basking in its glow.
(In my youth, back in the 1950s and 1960s, doctors and dentists had aquariums full of all kinds of crazy colorful creatures in their waiting rooms. The aquariums served the same purpose that televisions do today.)
The people in the waiting room can’t control the channel changer, which – I think – makes them droopy and inattentive. This is exactly what TV viewing was like in my youth: no control. You had your choice of a couple of things – three or four channels at most - and you made the best of it.
But here I am, tapping away on my iPad. I can write, send emails, surf the Net. I’m free!
Quick visual survey of the area: two magazine readers, three book readers, one iPod, one person actually watching the TV. There’s a surprising lack of representation from the iPhone / Blackberry community. (The stats just changed: one book reader just put down his Grisham and moved in front of the TV screen. Evidently he wanted to hear the story about Lady Gaga.)
Years of television exposure have made me TV-aware. I can’t help listening to the television, even when I have my back to the set and am trying to think about something else. MSNBC is moderately relaxing for me because I can live with most of the opinions presented; I can live without the visual content, however, as most of their presenters look like they were hit in the face with a two-by-four.
(But - you know? - I miss the days when doctors and dentists had aquariums.)
Sunday, June 10, 2012
For Sunday: “I’m a Hard-workin’ Dog,” from Sesame Street
This video is from Sesame Street’s very earliest days. I used to watch the show (though I was much too old for it) because I was fascinated by the creativity of the puppetry and animation and videos, and I was (at least dimly) aware that there was often a more mature humorous subtext.
This video is without subtext: it is what it is. I’ve never forgotten it, or the song in it. I can still sing it in my sleep, and I probably do.
“All I know how to do is teach a hundred cows some manners.”
Enjoy.












