Last week, Prince Harry displayed the royal weiner to some bachelorette-party girls in Las Vegas while playing billiards.
What fun!
I love the British royals. British history is a lot more fun than American history, because you can attach it to personalities: noble William the Conqueror, imperial Henry II, military Edward I, too-many-kids Edward III, etc., etc. It’s history that you can map as a family tree.
But let’s face it, it’s all about sex: who married who, who had whose bastards, who was gay, etc., etc. I mean, I know the name of Henry II’s mistress! And Edward II’s (two) boyfriends! And a couple of Henry VIII’s mistresses! So who are we kidding here?
Prince Harry is not my type. He is gingery and skinny, and he inherited most of the worst qualities from both his parents: Diana’s fairness and Charles’s clunky features. Seeing him naked does not charge up my batteries, or blow up my skirt.
Also, he will probably never be more than a prince. Wills and Kate are almost certainly destined to be K. and Q., and Kate will almost certainly produce a few kiddoes.
But I give Prince Harry credit for showing the meat-and-two-vegetables. He’s following in the footsteps of a long and noble line of ancestors.
Bully for Prince Harry!
No comments:
Post a Comment