A few Sunday mornings ago, the beloved Bill Geist did a story on “CBS Sunday Morning” about a grilled-cheese sandwich
festival/competition in Los Angeles. (Americans have fetishized cheese
sandwiches, just as they fetishize everything.) There’s a category in the competition
for sandwiches with bread and cheese only; there’s a category for “exotic”
sandwiches, with ingredients like pork ribs and pesto; and there’s a dessert
category, which is a cheese sandwich incorporating something sweet.
Partner sniffed at the second category. “Those aren’t cheese
sandwiches,” he said haughtily. “Those are rib sandwiches with cheese.”
“Why aren’t they cheese sandwiches with ribs?” I asked
innocently.
He glared at me. “Obviously the ribs are going to overpower
the cheese.”
I don’t get this. It’s a sandwich with cheese, so it’s a
cheese sandwich. Who cares what else it has on it?
Evidently I am not a food purist.
This reminded me of something from Elizabeth David’s “Is
There a Nutmeg in the House?”, but I couldn’t find my copy to give you an
exact quote. Here’s a general paraphrase:
“I was looking at the menu of a local pizza restaurant, and
noted that there were pizzas with bacon, and ham, and even pineapple. I am sure
these are very interesting, but they are not pizza. I am not sure what they
are.”
I worship the immortal soul of Elizabeth David, and
would never disagree with her. But I have to disagree with her here.
“Pizza,” for me, is a thing that looks like pizza: sauce and
cheese on a round flat bread-like crust. One of the original “pizzas” was the
Neapolitan pizza margherita, which is red / white / green like the Italian
flag: tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese, basil. Another “authentic” Neapolitan
pizza has an egg baked on top. (I love this, by the way, because I encountered
it often in Tunisia, which is about six inches below Italy on the world map.
Most of my American friends are either hilarified or disgusted by the thought.)
Sorry, kids: food is food. Pizza is pizza, whatever you put
on top. Cheese sandwiches are cheese sandwiches, whatever you cram into them.
I just made myself hungry.
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